Valentine’s Day: Self-Compassion

Some people love this holiday and some people hate it. Who is forcing you to celebrate it?

If you feel socially obligated to do something special this week then do this, work on self-compassion.

Self-compassion is a way of treating yourself with kindness instead of criticizing yourself. It has all of the benefits and none of the pitfalls of self-esteem.
I’m no expert, watch this video. This speaker, Kristen Neff, identifies the failings of self-esteem, three main parts of self-compassion and its benefits.

I followed some links and found her website. There is a book, if you want to spend money. There are videos, exercises for increasing your self-compassion, meditations and more.

If you’re skeptical like me, then it may sound like some hippy-dippy faith you must believe blindly. I am not asking you to do that. Watch the TEDx video and just keep an open mind. She makes some good points.

She has various exercises to help you work on your S-C and specifically mindfulness, common humanity and self-kindness.
One thing I love is that she encourages journaling and has a guided format for those shy about writing their feelings.

So maybe you’re not with your it man or woman on this made up holiday. So what!? Work on loving yourself, do random acts of kindness for people who need a smile, pamper yourself.
Pamper doesn’t mean spend a lot of money. Do something for yourself. You survived another year.

At the end of her exercises she offers some ways you might treat yourself. Who deserves a special something more than you?

Here are her ideas to treat yourself. Ultimately, do something you enjoy.
°Get a massage, a pedicure, or other form of pampering.
°Take a nap in the middle of the day.
°Go to a comedy club.
°Rent a tear-jerker DVD and let it all out.

°Listen to relaxing music while lying on the sofa with your eyes closed.

°Practice loving-kindness meditation or do yoga for a half-hour.

°Hang out with a friend for an evening.

°Go dancing (home, club, informal group). Or, do the self-compassionate body scan (guided meditation on her site).

°Have that oh-so-compassionate glass of red wine, accompany it with a large glass of water to help your body cope with its dehydrating effects.  Or, if you find you are drinking too much and it’s starting to harm rather than to enhance your well-being, have some dark red juice (cranberry, pomegranate, or cherry) mixed with sparkling water in a wine glass. Often just the sight of dark red liquid in a wine glass will trigger a relaxation response.

Who says you have to do it on the 14th. Chocolate goes on sale February 15th.

What do you think? Too far out or worth a try?

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Day 289: Game Nights

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Around Christmas, we all leave on our PJs (as long as possible) an drag out all the games we can find. The game pictured above is what I like to refer to as a smart folks’ game. It is called Set. There are different shapes, colors and types of shading. I play turns because I’m too much of a space cadet to play free for all. Awesome game for thinkers and I highly recommend it.

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Hoopla is a super super fun game. It’s like a faster okay version of Cranium. Even better, the group works as a team to beat the clock. Competition, although nice at times, is not a strong suit of mine. It tastes yucky.

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Boys playing something on the computer. The serious faces paired with the festive hats just kill me.

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Frog Juice is a fun competive game where players try to collect ingredients for spells. It is a turn based game that is a mix of luck and wit of the player. The artwork on the cards are very enjoyable as well.

The final game I wish I had a picture of is a story telling game. I think it would be cool to play with younger children. The goal of the game, Gloom, is to kill the wretched family of five that you have and kill them in the most miserable ways.
Note, I said miserable not hack and slash gross. You get negative points (good) for making them miserable. You can collect those points when the character is dead.

Example, one of my characters was haunted by ghosts, Beth’s character won the lottery (uh oh, positive points!!), but he got robbed later. Murcia’s character got struck by lightening.
The better you tell a story of how the event on the card occurred, the more hilarious the whole game.
I want to add it to my collection soon.

Do you have a favorite boardgame or cardgame?